Prognosis and Treatment Plan
“Masturbation is a Spiritual disease which a person falls into due to:
- Being heedless of Allah Ta’ala
- Lacking courage to confront the evil demands of the Nafs
- Feeling sorry for oneself”
[Hazrat Hafiz Qasim Paruk Saab]
To recover from this disease, one must learn to control lust and carnal desires (Shahwat). Research shows that 75% of Shahwat is linked not to physical need, but to thoughts and mindset. Many youngsters mistakenly believe lust is purely physical, whereas science has confirmed—just as our Mashaaikh have long taught—that it is largely psychological. Science has proved this recently, whereas our Mashaaikh have been telling us the same thing for years;
فكر كى گندگی ذکر سے دور کرتی ہے
“Ones thoughts being filthy distances one from the remembrance of Allah Ta’ala.”
In a few words, such great treasures are kept. Shaytani thoughts are down to the filth in one’s mind. Theres no need for any medication or treatment. If a person frequents the people of Zikr (Ahlullah), learns Zikr, and does it correctly, he will instantly be cured from these sins.
Everything has a standard in life, if something is not up to standard, then it won’t show its effect. If water is found at a depth of one hundred feet and I dig fifty feet deep, I will never get any water even if I dig a thousand holes. But if I dig one hole at a hundred feet, water will gush out. This is the standard in life.
Shaytani thoughts stem from the impurity of the mind. No medication is required—rather, the cure lies in Zikr. Nowadays, we don’t learn Zikr. And if we learn it, we don’t do it correctly. Nothing will change in our lives with one or two minutes of Zikr. If a person frequents the gatherings of the Ahlullah, learns Zikr, and performs it correctly and consistently, he will be cured of these sins.
The Standard of Zikr
Today, we neglect Zikr, or perform it superficially. One or two minutes of Zikr cannot transform a life. Everything has a standard: if water lies at a depth of 100 feet, digging only 50 feet—even a thousand times—will yield nothing. But digging once to the required depth will bring water gushing forth. Similarly, Zikr must be performed to its proper standard to show its effect. When done correctly, Allah Ta’ala cures the fever of lust, purifies thoughts, and redirects desire toward what pleases Him.
Without effort, even in old age one remains shackled by lust. With effort, even in youth one can achieve purity of thought.
Lessons from Experience
One elderly man, over 80 years old, respected in society, once came sobbing, confessing: “My hair is white, my body weak, yet I still enjoy casting lustful glances at strange women. How will I be saved from Jahannum?.” He was fully grey, to the extent that even his eyebrows had greyed. He came in, held my feet and began sobbing. I was surprised; such a respectable man, so many people come to him for their needs, and here he is in this state! He also added, “Physically, I don’t even have the strength (for intercourse). There’s no lust that is driving me to cast lustful glances.”
We learn from here that if a person doesn’t make effort to curb his lust, then even at eighty he will be drowning in sins of lust. And if one makes effort, then even in the peak of youth, his thoughts and desires will become pure.
Before coming here, one Hafiz was speaking to me. Alhamdulillah, he is a Zaakir and has made much effort in purifying his heart and mind. He has import and export business various items. He says he is currently importing some kitchenware items from China, and his dealings took him to China. He was previously unaware that the director of the company he is dealing with is a female. When he reached the meeting, there were two women present; the director and her deputy. He says, It was only the three of us in the boardroom. I entered and upon realising the situation, I became very uneasy. I regulated my thoughts and told myself, “This is just a meeting and something necessary for business.” This meeting lasted four hours, as we looked through the price and specs of each item. When I left the boardroom after four hours, I didn’t even know what any of these women looked like; I had not looked at their appearance even once.
A youngster at the peak of his youth.
He says because of this restraint I exercised, for the next four hours, I experienced such a sweetness of Imaan (Kayfiyyat), which I am unable to even describe.
If a person makes effort, then even a thirty-year-old in the peak of his youth can achieve such control over his thoughts and desires. And without effort, even at eighty, a person’s gaze and thoughts will remain filthy.
Controlling Thoughts
Lust is directly linked to thoughts. The mind is like a highway—good and bad thoughts constantly pass through. The key is not to allow evil thoughts to linger. Treat them like an unwelcome guest in a gathering: ignore them, turn your attention elsewhere.
As the saying goes:
خیالات کا آنا جانا برا نہی – برے خیال کا ذہن میں لانا اس کا جمانا اور لطف اندوز ہونا ، یہ برا ہوتا ہے
“Thoughts coming and going by themselves isn’t wrong. Purposely bringing evil thoughts into the mind, allowing them to settle, and enjoying them, this is wrong.”
Let us resolve never to entertain evil thoughts. Focus only on good thoughts that bring the pleasure of Allah Ta’ala.
The Natural Prescription: Nikah
Allah Ta’ala has given a natural cure for lust:
Marry whoever you please from the women…[Nisaa:3]
Today, most problems among youth stem from delaying marriage. Parents often consider their children too young, while the children themselves are overwhelmed by desire. Denied marriage, they fall into evils such as masturbation and Zina. Their studies and work suffer, as their entire focus shifts to fulfilling lust.
Shariah commands that once a suitable match is found and marriage is financially possible; the child should be married. Denying marriage leads to sin, for which both parent and child will be accountable.
As one poet lamented:
کتاب کھول کے بیٹھوں تو آنکھ روتی ہے
ورق ورق تیرا چہرا دکھائی دیتا ہے
“I open the Kitaabs and sit, my eyes flowing with tears. Every page I turn shows me your face”
Conclusion
Delaying marriage brings no benefit—it only fuels sin. By marrying at the right time, youth can study and work properly, while fulfilling their desires lawfully. Shariah has taught us that if a child is of marriageable age, and the parents refuse to get them married, whatever sin the child commits will be for the parent and the child as well.
May Allah Ta’ala grant us the Tawfeeq to rid ourselves of lust and evil carnal desires, and to live lives of purity and dignity. Ameen.